This past August I married my now German husband (J.P.) in the Canadian Rockies and wanted to include some German customs in our Canadian-German wedding.
Who better to ask than my German fiance? So when I asked J.P. which customs he wanted to include he shrugged and said “Can’t think of anything.” I was in disbelief, the man who had an opinion on everything from our wedding colors to our invitations to our chair hire to whether we should serve a plated dinner or buffet, now all of a sudden didn’t have an opinion on something that I actually needed his opinion on?
From a combination of attending a German wedding, speaking with German friends and Google research, I compiled a list of German wedding traditions. I soon realized that coming up with the traditions was the easy part but that actually implementing them would not be so easy as I started discarding them one by one. I didn’t think the Polterabend (breaking dishes the night before the wedding to bring good luck) would go over well in a Canadian national park. Nor would the rice throwing, which is not allowed in Canadian national parks. I convinced J.P. that our guests could blow bubbles instead. He remained unconvinced but relented, eager to be a law-abiding citizen, as most Germans are. Still he took the precaution of explaining the reason for the bubbles in lieu of rice to our German guests before the wedding, who ended up having the most fun blowing bubbles (top photo).
The log cutting Bavarian tradition was one of my favorite parts of our Canadian-German wedding.
I also didn’t want to walk down the aisle together as German couples normally do, believing that if we saw each other before the ceremony on our wedding day that it would bring bad luck. J.P. was fine with not walking down the aisle together but wasn’t impressed that now we would have to pay for TWO hotel rooms the night before the wedding, as he wondered aloud “Do all Canadians waste their money like this? “ I couldn’t really blame him, he had lived in Swabia, a part of southern Germany where the people are famous for being tight with their money for 18 years. Still I stood my ground.
I also didn’t want J.P.’s friends to kidnap me during the reception taking me away from my own wedding and hanging out in a local bar where J.P. would have to find me and buy a round of drinks for everyone. J.P. readily agreed to forgo this one – practically pointing out that none of his German friends knew any good bars in Banff having only just arrived the day before.
According to the log cutting ceremony our marriage is off to a good start – so far so good!
On the other hand I did forgo a veil as most Germans bride do (but to be honest I didn’t want to wear a veil anyway). We also omitted wedding attendants and just had two witnesses sign our marriage documents as is typically done in Germany. We served as the emcee ourselves. Had I not seen this working well previously at the German wedding we attended, I would not have been so easily persuaded, but it also relieved the burden of finding an entertaining bilingual emcee. We danced, or attempted to dance, the Viennese Waltz, another German tradition for our first dance. The most obvious and fun German custom (which is really only a Bavarian one) that we integrated into our wedding was cutting of the log. Directly following the ceremony the newlyweds must work together with a a two-person saw to cut through a log. It’s supposed to be symbolic of how well the couple will work together during their marriage and to show the couple that the marriage works much better when they work together. All Germans have heard of this, but none of our German guests, including J.P. had seen it before since none of them are Bavarian. We did it anyway, much to the confused look on our Canadian guests faces and the amused looks of our German guests who kept mumbling “They know that just because they’re moving to Munich, that they’re not Bavarian right?”
Ironically the Bavarian log-cutting tradition was one of my favorite parts of our Canadian-German wedding.
I never knew wedding customs could be so different in two related cultures. And the strange thing is that Danish traditions are closer to the Canadian ones It must have been a really great party.
Mette Christensen recently posted..Torta Sacher
Looks like a beautiful setting to be married in!
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Lovely post! I had no idea about some of these German wedding traditions at all, glad to learn about them. I like the wood cutting exercise.
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@Mette – So interesting to hear that Danish traditions are closer to Canadian ones than the German ones. I thought it was a good party, but our German guests were shocked that it was over at 1:00 due to a hotel rule to keep the noise down. Normally a good German wedding goes until the wee hours of the morning.
@Sam- It’s hard to beat the Canadian Rockies!
@Cheryl – Thanks Cheryl. Hope you’re able to go to a German wedding. It’s fun to see the differences.
Let me say first of all what a beautiful series of photos this is! Log cutting… now that’s an interesting tradition. Glad to hear you didn’t have to be kidnapped, though! Once again, congratulations!!!
Andrew Graeme Gould recently posted..Coquimbo, Chile: Fishing for machas
@Andrew – Thanks so much for the congrats Andrew. I love the log cutting, although I’ve happy I didn’t have to be kidnapped either
I’m glad I got to see a few of the wedding photos!
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Congrats, and thanks for sharing! We’re getting married later this year in the US and want to share with our American friends some of what we love about Bavaria. So we’ve been trying to figure out what are some wedding traditions.
(really beautiful dress, btw!!)
I loved this post! I really like that you tried to include German traditions in your wedding. Honestly, I didn’t know anyone still threw rice at weddings since that is a no-no here in the states too. Log cutting is very interesting and unusual. All in all, you had a very beautiful wedding and look like one happy couple
Debbie Beardsley recently posted..A Year at European Travelista
The mountains certainly make a beautiful backdrop for your wedding photos. Lovely pics and I love the log cutting tradition!
Laurel, love your tales! Thanks for sharing your lovely wedding. You did a great job planning from afar and sorting through the customs. We’re researching customs for our daughter’s wedding to a German young man in the Rathaus in his hometown in June. So far, they’re doing the log-cutting, rice toss, two witnesses, no veil. Hopefully no dish-breaking or kidnapping. We were forewarned about celebrating into the wee hours. Hmmm, 12 hours of $beer and more $$beer. Yay! Just got word that the German officials have approved the vast array of documents they submitted in English and German, certified in both languages, with Apostilles, etc. Any more customs for a wedding in Germany?
BTW, we had a great 14-day Canadian Rockies trip a few years ago: Banff, Lake Louise, Jasper and in between. Absolutely breathtaking! Highly recommended for hikers (my husband) and non-hikers (me), alike. Will do it again!
Mar recently posted..Our Take on Canadian-German Wedding Traditions
Congratulations! You both look very happy and it is great you made the effort to include both cultures in the ceremony. Beautiful mountain scenery as well. My favourite is still the Kananaskis pic with the mountain sheep. I swear I know those sheep. Bit of a cold snap here but a great winter with multiple Chinooks. The ice is fat. Good enrolment at MRC?
Barry recently posted..Mirror Lake – Yosemite National Park – Hiking California
Fun to learn about different wedding traditions. Who would ever guess there was a log-cutting tradition? Nice that you included both cultures. And what a beautiful wedding location you had. Loved seeing the pics!
Cathy Sweeney recently posted..Crossing the Vltava: Prague
Looks like a lovely place to be married in. Very cool that you were able to incorporate some mixed traditions. We also had bubbles instead of rice since we got married on a beach. Personally I think it was more fun that way and it made for some really cool pictures too.
Interesting way to combine traditions. I love the being your own emcee- one part of my wedding I did not like. Photos are great!
Looks like an amazing day! Love how you incorporated the traditions and your dress is gorgeous!
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Hi Laurel,
amazing place for a wedding
)
Speaking of the wedding traditions. I’m Bavarian, and certainly my wife and I had to cut our way through a log. It wasn’t that thick, so we thought it would be a snap, only our friends made sure the blade was blunt.
Clearly NO german/bavarian tradition was the “free throw challenge” our basketball teammates had arranged. We had to hit at least 5 FT’s before we were allowed to go on.
I think the mix of tradition and adaption of things that have a meaning for the couple help to make it a special, yet individual moment.
My only question is: do you know why it is illegal to throw rice in Canadian national forests? That sounds like one of those weird laws you see in email lists or something.
The log cutting sounds like fun
Beautiful pics by the way! I just went to a bi-national wedding this summer: German girl marries English guy outside London. It was kind of blended as well. The official parts were British, the speeches mixed/translated, and the bridesmaid and family organized some games (German things) to break up the reception. It worked out well, but I think all the British people in attendance now think that Germans are kind of crazy party people 
Apparently during a British ceremony, there are “only” speeches, food, and drinks – not pictures of the guests in weird get-ups, baloons, a quiz about the couple, etc.
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